Lu Wenhao’s 520 Extra ya~

2020.5.20 – Lu Wenhao’s Nth Failed Dating Attempt [1]

This time it was okay. The person in question was a local woman and was not too old – just a genuine sweet and lovely 18-year-old high school girl, whom he had been seeing for several months.

So how come it failed…..

Lu Wenhao: She said she liked her taciturn male classmate who not only fights with the teachers and classmates all day long, but has very poor academic performance. She’ll be confessing to him on his 18th birthday next Wednesday.

Lu Wenhao: I even saw their chat records and that stinky boy can’t say anything except ‘oh’.

Lu Wenhao: Is this cool? Is this the sense of aesthetics that young girls have nowadays??

Lu Wenhao: So I reasoned with her.

Lu Wenhao: I said that this kind of person has no advantage other than their face, he is not as interesting as me, nor is he as responsible as me, nor is he as rich as me.

Lu Wenhao: Am I not telling the truth, ah? Does she think we’re still in the 70s and 80s and gangsters are making a fortune [2]? Now, how powerful is it to fight, blacken and eliminate evil, ah! The very wall next to their school gate has these four words!

Lu Wenhao: As a result, I hadn’t even finished speaking and she blocked me.

….

[Omitting 100 words of abuse towards the school bully]

….

Lu Wenhao: She doesn’t know what a good man she’s lost.

Lu Wenhao: She’ll certainly regret her youthful ignorance in the future.

Lu Wenhao: “You there?”

【Lu Wenhao initiated a voice call】

【Xiao Jing ya~ refused the voice call】

Lu Wenhao: ?

Xiao Jing ya~: Here

Lu Wenhao: I’m so miserable and you don’t even reply to my messages?

Jing Huan took off his clothes with one hand, bowed his head and kissed Xiang Huaizhi, then said, “Pause for ten seconds.”

He typed quickly.
Xiao Jing ya~: Your online dating makes me sad; Your own texts, with love you’re mad. [3]

Xiao Jing ya~: I’m in a bit of a hurry so you chat by yourself for a while. Talk to you when there’s time.

Lu Wenhao didn’t send any more messages.

He was so angry, he decided to go out and buy a pack of cigarettes.

In the supermarket, a boy in a school uniform stood in front of him in the checkout queue. The same school uniform as the ones worn by students from his ex-girlfriend’s school. He suddenly started to pay more attention.

The boy had neatly cut hair, drooping eyelids, and a handsome face but seemed tense, making him seem unapproachable.

At the moment, the boy was scrolling through his WeChat. As he stepped forward, he clicked on a voice message without meaning to, causing it to ring out.

“Classmate Xu, are you coming back to school for evening self-study?”

Behind him, Lu Wenhao froze in place as if struck by lightning.

Isn’t this his ex-girlfriend’s voice???!

The shock helped him recall that his ex-girlfriend had saved the school bully’s WeChat as ‘Classmate Xu’. There was even a fucking heart afterwards !

Xu Siyang expressionlessly closed the chat without replying. When it was his turn to check out, he glanced at the counter and said: “Two packs of Zhonghua Soft.” [4]

The cashier, who was a new hire, glanced at his school uniform: “Controlling has been very strict recently, you need to show ID.”

“Didn’t bring it, I’m an adult.” Xu Siyang’s face remained unchanged. “I often come to your store to buy it, you can ask your boss.”

The cashier hesitated but took out the cigarettes.

Xu Siyang picked up his phone to scan the QR code and check out, but before he could scan it the camera was blocked by a large hand.

“He’s underaged, don’t sell it to him!” Lu Wenhao took the Zhonghu Soft packs in his hands. “I want them. How much for the two packs?”

Xu Siyang frowned and looked at him like he was insane. “Who are you? Do I know you?”

“I know you, alright,” Lu Wenhao said. “Laozi knows your 18th birthday is actually next Wednesday! You’re an adult, pei! [5] Stinky kid!”

Xu Siyang: “……”

Xu Siyang: “ ? ”

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T / N:

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1. The title is actually 《陆文浩520小番外一则~》or Lu Wenhao’s 520 Extra, ya~. The story, and the date it is set in (2020-05-20), is known as a day to express your love because of 520 (wǔ’ èr líng) sounding similar to “I Love You” (wǒ ài nǐ) back
2. 她以为现在还是七八零年代，混混好发财？I have no idea how that sentence fits with everything but I ran it a whole bunch of times through multiple engines so….back
3. I tried to make it rhyme at least as I think the original is meant to be quite melodic/slightly mocking. 你的网恋，我心疼；你的文字，还爱她。back
4. A type of cigarette with a softer flavour than the hard version of Zhonghua cigarettes. Amusingly, Zhonghua Soft is apparently more expensive than the hard-packaged stronger version due to scarcity. An image of the supposedly best and most expensive version of Zhonghua Soft (below)back
5. Spitting sound.back

Zhonghua Soft (most expensive version):

Please support Jiang Zi Bei’s works: here or on her author’s page: here